Perceptions of Youth and Beauty in the Dating World
Have you ever noticed how on a casual NY stroll along 5th Ave more and more guys in their early to mid 40’s are accompanied by a younger beauty under their arms? She might not be an upcoming CEO with a million in the bank, but she sure is youthful and beautiful! If you haven’t taken notice, pay attention next time you go people watching in the Big Apple. Guaranteed you will observe the exact thing that I am describing here.
Our city as we know it is comprised of millions of newly single or even long term single people, who are in transition, come from past failed relationships or are simply still looking for that one. With NYC bringing in people from all walks of life and from all over the world, it comes as no surprise that we see many individuals in their late 30’s and early 40’s looking for love.
However, the dating game for a woman in her late 30’s vs a man is substantially different. What I am about to open your eyes to is in no way fair or just- it is the world we live in.
On average men and women past their 30’s are both considered to be at the prime of their career and life stability if they have followed a set life trajectory plan. (Education, work advancement, personal growth, financial stability). They can be both equal in this regard, due largely to a phenomenal growth in the Feminist movement and overall independence of a woman.
However, when it comes to mate choosing, women are presented with a set of disadvantages. She is “past her prime” for childbearing (yes, even with all the modern technology, one cannot fully fool nature). They say beauty fades, and no matter how unjust or myogenic you think this term is, there is some relevance to it. If there wasn’t, the plastic surgery field would not be the most highly booming medical field today!
Just have a look at the media and magazines. A man who has some “age” on him (gray hair, a few wrinkles) is considered “sexy”. A woman on the other hand, is expected to look fully youthful, resembling a young teenager, who was just recently listening to her parents warning her about men and dating.
We glorify this perception of beauty. We buy the magazines, admire models and criticize actresses who look “old” on camera. This starts and ends with us as human beings buying into the perception.
Go to Times Square, glance at the Billboards, you’ll even notice this in the Male vs Female models (where by the way the age of an acceptable High fashion model allows a man to be at his prime in the business in his late 20’s early 30’s and a woman past 22 can pretty much forget about it!).
Hollywood is no different. An actress is deemed at the peak of her career at 22 and should consider retirement at 35 (unless she’s Meryl Streep of course)! You know what I am talking about! Numerous women have already spoken out on this injustice and a demand for change.
Thus, it comes as no surprise that when it comes to dating, women are certainly at a disadvantage, as the outer layer is given priority, (at least at the beginning stages of courtship).
The question that arises is: what can we do with this information? Can we start to change this perception and injustice? How can we restructure a fully evolved society that we helped create and support?
The change starts within us as a society, the perception we give to the future generation. Let’s start from those Billboards.